Learn To Drive

Is there something about owning a large 4-wheel drive vehicle which causes one to become an utter moron while driving? Don't get me wrong--I'm not one of those "SUVs are destroying the environment and should be outlawed!" types. But, I just can not fathom why it is that some people feel the need to purchase a massive off-road capable juggernaught when they drive like the proverbial little old lady on her way to church. 99% of the time, the people driving these things wouldn't even dream of taking them on a well maintained dirt road, let alone actually off road.

What brings up this rant? you ask. Yesterday, I had to make a quick stop at the local mall (a scarey enough prospect). Travelling through the parking lot, I got stuck behind some yutz dring a Ford Excursion who came to a full and complete stop before inching over each and every speed bump. Now, the speed bumps I'm talking about here aren't your car killer bumps that stand a foot high (and even if they were, I believe a 4-wheel drive vehicle with re-enforced suspension could handle it). Just to give you an idea here, I used to hit these very same speed bumps in my Ford Escort at ~10-15 mph without a worry in the world. They're wussy speed bumps, really. Yet here this bozo was stopping at each one, then creeping forward ever so slightly to ease over the bumps. Then, the driver apparently got rather confused at an "intersection" in the lot, where she again came to a complete stop (no stop sign for us, but stops for the other 2 directions), started to turn left, got half-way through the intersection then suddenly veered right, then finally opted to complete the left turn she originally started.

Hey, people . . . if you're going to drive an off-road capable machine, don't drive it like a subcompact. Don't become a wuss at the sight of a speed bump or crack in the pavement. I'm not saying you have to go gung-ho and try to catch some air, but learn to take them at least as fast as us econo-car drivers. And, for Pete's sake, grow a brain.